Hello. I’m back to try again as nothing panned out from my last two posts. Let’s start off with the normal ‘I don’t want to change your situation and ditto to mine’ thing.

If you’re here, I’m going to assume you like larger shouldered/muscled men that aren’t necessarily ripped, but aren’t jiggly and definitely not scrawny. I assume you like bearded men, maybe you like brown eye? For my sake I hope you do at least. I assume you like large, rough hands and some tattoos maybe. That would be me, so if you’re not into that esthetic, you might want to go ahead and keep looking. I have dark brown hair, a well-trimmed beard, dark brown eyes, and the rest of what’s described above.

I’m obviously married and I do have kids that are my world. Why am I here? Well, a vanilla and boring sex-life would be the cause of that. Personally, I blame the Bible Belt and their fundamentalist ideologies for it. But regardless, here I am. Looking for a connection with someone that can match my freak and make me laugh while doing it. Because, as a good buddy once said, if you can make a person laugh, you can make them squirt.

I’m prior military, have a professional career now, and a fucked up sense of humor. I’m not going to lie and say I can talk your ear off 24/7. That’s just not who I am. However, I can hold a decent conversation with someone that can do the same. Something that (apparently) quite a few people here can NOT do.

Though I was infantry, I do know how to read and my favorite flavor of crayon is teal. Something about the blue and green mix just really brings out that non-toxic wax flavor. Anyway, because I know how to read, I do know the difference between “their”, “there”, and “they’re”. Sexy, I know. ;)

There’s many more things about me, but that’s what chatting is supposed to be about, so ask me anything. Expand on anything I mentioned, tell me your favorite type of tree, that sounds weird and cool. Anything and everything is open for discussion.