Married and have a couple of young kids. The marriage needs to be saved because it's lacking in key areas, which you can fill. Well, I'll be doing the filling but let's not get lost in technicalities.

I want something real. The best sex I've had has always been in ongoing relationships that had emotional components, so I'm looking for long-term. Our relationship will be a zero drama zone. We already get our fill of drama in real life and we'll work smart to keep those absurdities out of our relationship. From the comfort of our walled garden, we'll philosophize and laugh at those absurdities but none of them will penetrate -- I'll be doing all the penetrating in our secret life.

Our relationship will focus on:

• Lots of fun sex; including long foreplay, passionate making out, and kissing all over.
• Lots of laughter; our motto will be "laughter makes life worth living" and no subject will escape our dark humor.
• Honesty; our relationship will be 100% bullshit free. To hold us to that, each of us will legally change our middle name to "Forthright." We'll leave the lies of the real world behind and tell each other only plain unadorned truths, without concealment or embellishment. Moreover, if you're so inclined, we can refer to each other as Mr. and Mrs. Forthright using posh English accents during our sex games and at high tea.

I'm slim/fit, educated, and have a flexible schedule. When not working, I'm cooking up a storm in the kitchen, reading/writing about deep and thoughtful ideas (and sometimes wacky ones), spending time in the great outdoors as much as possible, and exercising regularly so that my body can keep up with my mind.

I like women that are pensive, have a gift for gab, and are emotionally intelligent. You'll make me swoon if you also love to laugh, like lots of eye contact, wear your heart on your sleeve, and are touchy-feely.

If you’re interested, send me a DM! What's there to lose? Are you afraid to lose your marriage? Don't be! If we're smart about it, this relationship will save our marriages! 😜