Hello!

I'm a big fan of autumn and I'm looking for other folks who also enjoy what this season brings: hot cocoa, scary movies, and excuses to throw small objects at noisy children (i.e., candy).

I'm looking forward to seeing Smile 2 and would love to have someone go with and then share reviews over some coffee.

I also do have *some* ulterior motives as you may guess from my decision to post here! I hope to find someone for something long'ish term (something more than ghosting each other after three dates, and something less than eloping and riding off into the sunset, I don't think I'm ready for the latter any time soon).

In a way, I'm seeking/offering the "gf/bf" experience--let's go on dates, send each other cheesy messages and memes throughout the day, and eventually bump uglies in the dark. I'm a kinky MFer but I do have some self-control and respect for my partner's boundaries, so don't worry about being tied up to a trebuchet on our first date 😂.

I'm married, no children, and live by myself. I don't need to know anything more about your own personal life than you would like to share with me, and I'm comfortable sharing as much/little as you would to know about me in return. For now, I have chosen not to separate to protect the extended family members who have been well intermingled.

I'm not here to chase sex and hookups. I'm a very affectionate person and after more than a decade of that affection being unreciprocated and unappreciated, I am seeking an alternative.

I'm discreet, know the difference between discreet and discrete, and I'm pretty good with technology. I have found an AP before and we had an amical parting when she moved. Please have your shit together, I do not want to be murdered by your SO and become the subject of a poorly adapted Lifetime channel direct-to-streaming movie.

I'm an atheist and a liberal, and I am not going to reject someone for being a Christian or being conservative. My limit would be flat earthers and anti-vaxxers, for the obvious reasons: I'm here to catch feels, not infection diseases.

I'm average height, with an average/athletic build. My work gives me a lot of flexibility to pursue my creative projects. I'm currently an emerging baker and musician (don't ask me to serenade you yet, but I can make you some cookies).

I love traveling to new places and would love to have a weekend/overnight camping/cabin trip if the ✨ align. I'm a big fan of outdoor stuff, so even just a nice picnic by the lake would be perfect! I do not smoke, but I am an aspiring Whisk(e) connoisseur.

My spirit animal is probably the golden retriever. I listen to Rick Ross in the car (#fortheloveofbass) way too loud and I sing way too enthusiastically to country music than my singing talents would suggest. I laugh at almost anything and nearly everything.

I'm looking for someone smart, caring, has a good sense of humor and has an unsatisfied taste for adventure.

If you think we may be a good match, then don't be shy: let me know what scary movie is at the top of your watch list!

P.S. My brain works faster than I can type, so apologies for any typos I missed even after proofreading several times 😵‍💫