The reason why I'm writing this is that I feel like I have been changing and I really don't know whether I like this or not.

Two weeks ago, I finished my trauma treatment for years of physical and mental abuse from my Narc mom. And I have been noticing that I have been changing a lot. I used to be really a perfectionist: always get high grades in university, always putting a lot of effort into my assignments, sometimes being really stressed out about that. And now? I feel like it doesn't matter to me that much anymore. I have been slacking a bit: not going to all lectures instead of reading the slides and getting lower grades because I don't work on assignments at night anymore (actually, not that low, but like a B instead of an A).

Instead, I'm getting more into music and writing like I did when I was a young teenager and I'm really enjoying that. I am spending more time with family and friends, also because the COVID-19 restrictions are not there anymore and taking my time to wind down after a long week of studying.

Multiple study friends have been asking me if I'm okay because they don't see me in all lectures anymore. The thing is: I feel almost fine, but I'm afraid that I will go down a slippery slope and will end up not studying hard at all.

Has anyone experienced this before? That you feel like your personality and/or life goals have changed since going into treatment for Narc abuse from your parents?