I was recently diagnosed with NPD. Narcissism was already a topic I had heard and thought about. I believe, NPD or not, that I have a problem with vain and narcissistic tendencies. I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that my problem stops me from enjoying the world (movies, art, music, etc) and learning new things because all these activities mean confronting something that would make any narcissistic or extremely vain person uncomfortable, like imperfection, failure, ugliness or incompetence. For example, if I learn to draw, then I must do it badly because doing something badly at first is part of the learning process. But I’m uncomfortable because it reveals a weakness about myself. I have had this experience. I can’t watch movies or listen to music because I compare myself to the actors, directors and musicians and there accomplishments and resent the experience. I begin to devalue the work and looks for excuses to do something else.

Does this sound plausible to anyone else? What could I do to help myself?