On the 10th, I changed stories but decided to keep my word count for both drafts. On the 17th, I passed 50k by over 2,000 words but I never felt that sense of accomplishment I was expecting. Instead I felt a lack of motivation to really push myself. To continue writing, yes, but not to strive to finish my first draft by the end of the month.

Earlier this week, I realized I was only 10k behind where I needed to be in order to reach 50k on that second story by the end of the month. I've been pushing myself all week and with just under 48 hours to go, I hit exactly 50k.

I'm exhausted and ready for bed but I'm honestly crying a little because I never thought I could actually accomplish this. I have the time but always ditch my stories between 20 and 30 thousand words. That first story this month I stopped at 29,309. But, for the first time ever, I managed to push through and continue writing the story even though I hated it, even though I felt completely stuck. I just jotted down a note to change something and moved on.

NaNoWriMo has been an invaluable experience for me as I learned not only what I am capable of, but also a few things that do and don't work for me. Unfortunately this also means that I get to start cleaning up this disaster zone that apparently used to be my bedroom.