The closest I ever had to a real interview was my first interview but I swear they were just trying to ask as stupid of questions as possible to see what they could get away with. They also made me take a personality test? I have no idea why. It was to be a cashier. Angry scanning monsters don't need personalities, they need restraint.

My next interview consisted of instantly being put on the register and told to work a shift. If I did well they'd give me the job, if not I'd just get paid for the one shift. They gave me money to go get McDonalds. I was vegetarian but they didn't understand when I told them there was nothing there that I ate and got all weirded out at me for coming back with only fries. They were weird.

After that I was semi-seriously interviewed for about 2min before the owner's cellphone went off and he wandered away to talk on the phone. I then spent about 15min joking around with the manager and hoping that nobody would notice I had a sprained neck since I felt it would affect my odds of getting the job. The phone conversation kept going on in the background.

Next two they just asked what my availability was because they'd already decided to hire me.

The one after that was asking my availability over the phone because they'd already decided to hire me.

Last one was just filling out an application and being told within 2min that they'd already decided to hire me and explaining all the different things that I'll have to do. It was more like I was interviewing them tbh.

I think that if ever I get a real interview where they ask me questions I'm going to just blank and have no idea what's going on. It'll be great. I'll get drunk after and cry while watching anime and eating ice cream.

I can't be alone on this though, right? Real interviews are just things that happen in movies and stuff to scare you, right? Nobody gives a fuck about interviews, people just kinda randomly pick resumes from piles and decide to hire that person because giving interviews is probably a huge pain in the ass. SOMEONE PLEASE CONFIRM THIS I'M GOING INSANE. I thought for sure once I entered the world of jobs you need to go to school for I'd get a real interview but now I'm not so sure.