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The title is obvious! Non-monogamy is everywhere and it scares the hell out of me đ
It is portrayed as everybody is non-monogamous, also talking with people it seems everyone is non monogamous except me.
I am F48 and single again (broke up with ex of 2 years who wanted non monogamy⌠Podcasts, dating, social media⌠everywhere! All men I connect with say that they indeed want a non monogamous relationship , they want FWB. Many podcasts held by women praise non monogamy!
It is portrayed as if those who âpretendâ to be monogamous are fearful, insecure people!!
I tried, tried it hard⌠thinking I might have a blockage or whatever⌠I canât!!! I am and want monogamy!
I want a relationship with 1 man, committed in love and sexually exclusive⌠thatâs what I desire and it has become a mirage.
In my age category most people that are single seem to be people who were married and monogamous for 2 or 3 decades and came to the conclusion they were non monogamous.
I have been single for almost 10 years⌠except short relationships with men who seemed to always realize they are not monogamous.
It feels like I am a âleft overâ monogamous person. Monogamous people who married young are still married⌠the singles in my age range are non-monogamous that felt trapped in a monogamous relationship.!
I am scared sad and feel like I have to burry my desire for a monogamous committed relationship. I feel like, if I want a companion a lover I have no choice than sharing himâŚ
I feel like I have to chose between pest and cholera. Remaining alone or accepting non-monogamy.
Sorry for my ramblingâŚ. I feel terribly lost and deeply sad đ
Ok. Iâll give you the unpopular response.
First of all, your desire for a monogamous relationship is not at all weird or strange or unique. It still is the predominant and most desired relationship dynamic for the vast majority of people.
Having said that, there are many people that want something other than monogamy and thatâs ok too.
Neither (in my opinion) is more or less valid than the other.
My wife and I are monogamish. Monogamy is our SOP however we DO have the flexibility to share in other âshared experiencesâ if we choose.
I suspect many of the non-monogamous people youâre meeting are likely looking for something less than swinging, less than open and less than polyamorous. In my experience, most are looking for the option to have âoccasional shared experiencesâ.
If thatâs still something youâre not cool with, thatâs fine. Nothing at all wrong with that. I just wanted to point out that there are lots of way to approach non-monogamy and sometimes the lesser more âcontrolledâ options are not considered.
Either way, good luck to. you. I hope you find peace and happiness.
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