I was with my mommy for a whole year, the first long-lasting one I ever had. It all started purely sexual, but ended up becoming deeply romantic, forming the strongest bond and connection I had ever felt in my life. I fell in love, and so did she. She was an incredible mommy, all I could have ever wanted. And she molded me into her perfect good boy, and boyfriend, too. We ended up having a full-fledged relationship where we would talk everyday, spend time together, share our deepest secrets, play games together, watch movies... Yet, one day, out of nowhere, she disappeared. Sent a short goodbye, and blocked me everywhere. Shortly after, I found out she started a relationship with a friend she knew in real life, just days after ghosting me. And after tying some loose ends, I realized they had been doing things behind my back for at least a week prior.

I don't know how to move on, stop thinking about this. It was three weeks ago, and even though I'm doing much better (because the first week I couldn't even move from bed), I can't really forget. I feel a mix of anger, sadness, longing, loneliness, and doubts about what in the hell happened. Not getting any closure, or even truth about what was going on in her life, made it even worse. Part of me hates her, part of me still loves her. And I hate that I love her.

Hopefuly, working on my hobbies, passions, going out, and meeting more people will help. Still working on the last thing tho, because I don't seem to find anyone compatible. But we'll see.

Any advice or support is welcome, especially if you've gone through this. I need to know there's light at the end of the tunnel.