There are fewer and fewer places that are not getting shit up by some asshat that can't just leave someone with a differing opinion alone, but I digress.

To preface, I have Aspergers and depression and trying to cope with it has only been harder as time goes on. I might start a hobby and all is good until all the other apes have to shit it up and (as of late) make it political. I mean for fuck sake is nothing sacred?

Any culture I could relate to for the most part is at least from 5-10 years ago, and even things like Discordianism or Levayan Satanism are shells of their former self and reflect the larger culture instead of influencing them. It seems like there are fewer avenues to vent this frustration or jam the culture as the culture is sold at Walmart and Hot Topic for only 19.95. There are no Bill Hicks or other court jesters to point out the king (society) has no clothes. Hell many of the good ones passed on or joined in. My larger point is there is no resistance to the bullshit. Even with things that are meant to keep mind mind off this, like the meetup that kept me sane closed it's doors (I believe for good). I just want to be able to tinker or do creative things without being a hermit and I can't even keep sane. I get the deal with the virus, but to a certain extent both individuals and governments fucked up in their responses.

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Since I was 16 I had an uneasy feeling in my gut that things flipped around 2010/2011. I am not trying to assign blame to anyone or anything in particular, I just knew I needed to leave my home country. 11 years later I have visited about 5 countries and now with Covid the number of countries that are truly worth it are good for very specific things and that's it. I used to thing there could be a panacea country where I could be left alone and rot in my vices, but that would be to easy. Nope. I will preface this by saying that yes the respective countries I wanted to perhaps reside in are the people's country, thus they owe me shit. But life is too short to deal with people's bullshit and I would rather program and engage in the vices of my choice (and earn money for those vices) than pander to someone's bullshit take of slave morality, whatever flavor of the month it is. Thankfully there is one place that can take care of some of the vices and the money part and once I save up I am getting residency there as they have not turned into fruitcakes.

So in order to prepare for the fact I can't make a dent on society (and that I should not waste my time on insufferable creatures that love the mud they roll around in), I figured I would have a backup plan if things went to shit. I ran for office, lost, licked my wounds, and decided to work on myself instead as I was not ready for the political realm yet (and probably never will be if I am honest). But here we are 5 years later and my backup plan is at best half assed. There are places I like to chill or to put my money, but the countries that seemed best for all that (Colombia, Chile, Paraguay, Hong Kong, Singapore, among others) went 180 on policy and except for Colombia I really don't have much use for any of the other countries. They may have their charm but seriously I value my life and don't want to get into a half ass arrangement. So as of now I have two countries in my plan but in terms of ultimate plans (whether to stay or leave) I am kind of mixed. Suffice to say I just want to go in the jungle, program, and smoke my devils lettuce and maybe take some psychedelics on occasion.

The thing that has been worrying me lately is that I see people in their vehicles with masks, out walking, even biking with masks on. If American's are that subservient, imagine other countries with more of a collective outlook on things are. I actually wore a mask in enclose areas before others, so I am not exactly opposed. However, when I wore the right masks, I was told to take it off (I believe it was on a flight), and since then I have not given a shit. Then the thing that gets me is that the very same people that say biohacking is a bad idea and a that are taking an experimental medicine alone those same lines and don't ask questions. I mean your body your choice and if you join the undead in a zombie apocalypse, you go guy (I am being a bit sarcastic, but I do worry about the long term implications). On top of this the Constitution is being pissed and used as toilet paper. Yes this has made me reconsider what rights actually are.

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Outside my family and fiance and on occasion friend I am kind of sick of this lemming mindset. But the thing that bothers me even more is that it is worldwide, whereas usually if something happens you usually have a safe haven (think the US or Switzerland during WWII, Canada during the Vietnam War, etc.). Add to that a very distorted view of reality and it makes me wonder if something did happens in 2012 that made us trip into an alternate universe or something. It seems like the number of relatable people (not some ape pretending to be a human) is dropping year by year.

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Sorry for the word salad and I hope I did not get too political. I tried to keep away from getting into that and I can edit it if need be.