Every Christmas time I will push hard all year and come holiday time my back will give out and blood pressure goes through the roof to the point any physical work will overload,I buy from my girl and it’s really good well 2 days ago I bought 1p from her and said I will go to ward,later that night I refused to go and bought 1 for work and my mindset little went straight to sissy hypno kinda shit/dressing and burning chest/with excessive sweat and heart rate skyrocketed to the point I’m drinking beer and having serequel to counter it,5 years later and I pretty much have breasts lol anyway once I get to the point where heart rate is to high/to scared to work/can’t handle 1 more argument/can’t have rum or bourbon and end up in the ward,for like a month and spend next 6 months financially recovering,while I’m in I get people to check the house and yes she will run buisiness from our house even though I said no and she will use my car unlicensed driver for a month….this shits getting old I had to say no to going to work today