I know, title may sound goofy as fuck.

I relapsed after 2 months. In those 2 months i slowly regained confidence on myself, started having dates again, sharing beautiful moments and being proud of me.

Last thursday I bought a gram, thinking that i’ll be capable of saving it and take low doses on specific occasions (i knew i was lying to myself).

I’ve only slept five hours since, ate two times, drank around 5 liters of water (not that much). I feel fucking EMPTY and buried and i can’t even imagine how hard these next days will be.

The thing that kills me most is the guilt. Or shame. The assessment of damages. How do U deal with this specific emotion?

thank U for reading me. Have a beautiful day and sleep ❤️