I really can't understand my theraphy.

I am severely ill right now, much enough so that I cant live normally, working properly...etc.

And I strongly believe that my stupidity drag me into the situation here, and my theraphist used to tell me it's really not,

now though we are in an agreement point it is "maybe and maybe not, and doesnt matter period". understandable since it is theraphy.

But then, she strongly try to relate my self-destructive thought and behavior to my mom and dad's parenting. I know parenting always affect on children and their ego and their furthur life.

However, I think she over-generalize, and exaggerate. She keep mention my parents are both in educational job field, so that must have affected you this way and that way, and that's accordding to the psychological theory, not her own thoughts.

I don't think my parents was more strict than any other friends around me in my period, maybe my mom tried to control me at that time too much in a caring way, I think she was. but I actually don't remember much either... (my memory is vague as one of my symptom) i keep thinking most parts are my gene not my parents!

I just can't understand how the clearer former one shouldn't be cause and effect, and how the latter vauge one should be cause and effect, because it's a theory and common things to happen.

It's like just picking the pieces which can be helpful to my mental regardless of truth. and I cannot do that. Maybe I am too self defensive and think in OCD way?