So I just found out my grandaunt (maternal grandmother's sister) who I'm super close to has approx 6 months to live as she was recently diagnosed with cancer (for the 3rd time). I lost my grandmother to cancer 10 years ago and honestly it feels like a repeat of the situation. But this time im in a city across the country without any of my family members around as I recently got married. I'm trying to be strong cause I have faith it'll be okay and whatever is meant to happen will, but I also can't bear the thought of losing probably one of my most loved and favourite people on earth. My chest feels heavy, it feels like I have something strangling me. My heartbeat has quickened and my head is tightening around my brain (well it feels like it is). I can't help but clench and well to sum it up it's just a full out panic attack I know will be going on for the set of months. I have to carry out my life as a wife and daughter in law but also manage the emotions linked to the situation back home. Im terrible with my words and feel like I can barely be there for my aunt my cousins my own mother and sister. I was known for hugs haha and I can't even give those. I obviously can't be speaking to anyone about this on the daily here not that I would but it's just a personal matter now vs a family matter? If that makes sense... Just different with the inlaws right? Not sure how I'm going to handle myself honestly as I already felt like I was struggling alot prior to the knowledge of the situation. Not even sure what to ask for just needed to let my thoughts out I guess. Thanks for your time if you've read this far 😔❤️