I was trying to help myself with MDMA for many years, in 5yrs i think i tried MDMA at least 8 times, always with the intention of helping myself. I didn't know I had OCD ( i still dont know for sure, but i am planning to visit the doctor soon). Now the first time was an amazing lot of euphoria...you know it...

But after the 3rd one, i started overthinking too much and i basically convinced myself i did something horrible when i was a child. (I learnt about False Memory OCD, but OCD wouldn't let it go so i wa living with that thought all this time And as you probably know, stupid me i thought more MDMA sessions could help me from this. And to me the funny thing is that on my last session i actually forgive myself for that made up thing haha.

Hence my last post...

I was too afraid to ask my parents or siblings if something happened when i was a child.

Until today i asked my mom and she said she doesn't remember anything bad happened. Know she could be lying or something but that's probably OCD acting again.

So i guess my advice is be careful and i guess don't believe everything your head can come up with while you're high on MDAA.