I think it's relevant to start out with some basic info. I'm a very young adult teaching in a Shito Ryu karate dojo, I am one of the head instructors, there is only one instructor ranked higher than me and he is a master (6th dan). I come up with lesson plans, I teach up front, and I teach 2 separate classes of different age groups. I have a total of about 50 students.

One student in particular concerns the instructors.

For the sake of his privacy we'll call him Carl. Carl is 13.

Carl joined the class so we could "whip him into shape" and teach him about respect. He has had issues in the past with physically hurting his siblings and kids at school as well as strange social behavior. His parents told us he has autism, but his father recently admitted to lying about his son being diagnosed and that "we thought if we said he wasn't diagnosed you wouldn't believe us, we're sure he's just autistic!".

I hate to talk about a student like this, but I think there is something much more than autism going on with Carl. He has been fixating on me and my sister (we're both Senseis), refusing to call us Sensei (which I don't tend to be upset about, but he's even been scolded by fellow students and will not do it). He will pick one of us and stare at us the entire class. I'm not exaggerating when I say the entire class, from the moment he walks onto the dojo floor to the moment he leaves he stares, only looking away when he absolutely has to. This staring isn't just looking at us, however, while he stares he'll start raising his eyebrows, laughing, smiling and nodding, like we're having a conversation. He greets me by sneaking up behind me, putting his hands on my shoulders and saying "guess who?". Each time I ask him not to do it again... he doesn't listen. He likes to bring up dating me or my sister and gets weirdly touchy with us.

He has gotten in trouble a few times for getting physical with his siblings and "Acting creepy" to a girl at school, and oftentimes gets pushups for showing up in a horribly wrinkled Gi (neat gis are very important in the dojo, you either show up in a clean and well kept gi or you don't come to class.) but he does it at least half of the time. He seems to really like to do the pushups, or rather the attention it gets him. He oftentimes acts out violent hypothetical attacks on himself or other students during self defense, even neglecting the actual techniques he should be practicing.

The worst of his behavior however is the lying. He lies constantly. He starts conversations by lying. He'll lie about who his grandparents are in front of his father. He doesn't even lie to cover up anything that would get him in trouble, but he lies about anything else. It's beyond normal kid lying, he does it as though he can't help himself. I've spoken to him many times about it, I confront him every time he lies and gets caught.

Carl's behavior is starting to seriously creep out the other students in class. I want the environment my students are learning in to be a place they feel comfortable and safe, but I don't want to alienate Carl because he's still one of the students.

This whole thing is very strange to me because I've never been treated this way by anyone. I tend to be an intimidating person, and a few sharp words is all it takes to get rid of unwanted attention. I'm the sort of girl who will knock out someone for being creepy. I can handle weird behavior from men, but I don't know how to handle this for 2 reasons. 1. He's 13, I can't just treat him how I'd treat someone my own age for his behavior. 2. he's my student, I need to uphold a level of professionalism as well as see what I can do to help him.

Can someone please let me know what I can do?