I 36m have been married to my wife 35f for 16 years we have had ups and downs but nothing we can't handle a few years back I started dealing with ED and I know it is from allot of meds I take and an accident I had a few years back that nearly killed me. My sex drive has been so messed up mentally I want it daily but my body has no desire to perform I take Ed pills to make it work but doesn't always work for me and I love to eat and sadly it doesn't always cut it. Now Couple years ago I lost my job And Trying to Find a job Work for me Has been hard But I found a job that Required me to drive a half hour To the job And in this economy My pay wasn't the best I then promised my wife When I finally got my day job I would never go back to nights But a position opened that paid better and I took it And I ended up going back to nights My wife And I Went through a light rough patch With me working nights And her being on days I was not Mentally Giving her The mental stability she needed or emotional stability She then started talking to old friends of hers Which I was okay with Well I ended up getting fired from the job Long story to that one But I noticed now she talks to one friend More And at first it didn't bother me She doesn't have many friends You're not going to hold it against her But then I started feeling like the friend was more important than me And it started to really get under my skin But I don't want to tell her that she can't be friends with him anymore. I have noticed and she is told me that she's having an emotional affair with this person and I know there was at one point she was very upset with me and done with our marriage and she wanted to go out and meet this gentleman in person she has in the past that was a long time ago. So she had made plans paid for the hotel room and they were going to meet at a renfair for a day. And then come home the next day I have been fighting myself on saying ok on it but I then decided to go down to the Ren fair and let them meet and if somthing happens between those 2 just letting her have it now, me is a person I am self-conscious on being not good enough weather as a husband or as a partner and if she does have a 1 night stand with him and wants to continue do I make this an open relationship but keeping our house the happy middle or should I step down let the friend be her new replacement or should I end the affair between them and consider marriage counseling I mean I did recommend if we did decide to open the relationship and we had set ground rules I'm just worried that I'm going to be replaced and I don't know if this is the right route anybody's too sense worth would be great fully appreciated Tl;dr all help would be nice