TL;dr My wife and I have been married 12 years. I caught her having an affair in 2019. Stumbled upon texts and found out they met up on more than one occasion. It still affects me to this day. She's a very cold person. There's zero affection between us anymore and barely intimacy. The trust has been broken and it actually took her weeks to actually admit bit by bit her indiscretions. Tl;dr I still am pretty convinced I dont know everything. In her defense at the time we were already kind of distant. But I did not stray. I love her , as the mother of our children. But it obvious we're at a point where we're basically roommates. We haven't slept in the same bed in 2 years, mainly bc our one daughter doesn't feel comfortable in the room alone she's still young. I'm constantly getting gaslit and manipulated. I want a divorce I'm pretty sure she does to. I think we're just both to codependent to follow through. Plus I can't put my two kids through that even though us fighting everyday is probably worse for them. Just looking for anyone dealing with a similar situation? Any help is greatly appreciated.