I was reading something on here and had a light bulb moment. Of the two serious gfs I have had, both seemed hot and cold a bit. I had realized I tried to seek affection that sometimes it felt like my mom lacked, but now I feel like I am putting the pieces together. My mom and I could get along for quite a bit, but then we would argue. Some of it might be my fault, but then she would scold me for how I fucked up, and it would make me snap and get anxious and then angry at her. And after a bit, we would be cool again. I realized that this is a pattern I am repeating in my relationships with women as well. I guess I will need to try and work on this more and maybe read up on the Anima a bit more as self assurance seems preferable to seeking it outside.