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That's it, that's pretty much the question. So, my girlfriend and I have been in a relationship for the past two and a half years. When we started dating, both of us were in great shape. But the last year hasn't been as kind to us, work-wise. And as they say, we've both put on some healthy relationship weight. I'm a gym freak, so I used that weight as an excuse to go on a bulk and I gained some strength as well as muscle. And I'm going to go on a cut at the end of this year and the beginning of the next year.
But, on the other hand, my girlfriend did not do the same. She did not embrace it. And she's put on some 20 to 25 pounds of fat. And through ways she talks with me and how she perceives herself, how she gets her photos clicked, how she behaves in bed, I can tell that she does not find herself pretty.
Throughout our relationship, I have always found opportunities to mention how beautiful I think she is, how pretty I feel my girlfriend is. And I've always expressed it to her in the most mesmerizing ways possible. I have not stopped doing that from the day we started dating. I do that till date. But somehow, I feel that she does not believe me. I talk about her in bed. Every time she sends me her photos in new outfits, I compliment her. I compliment her eyes, how she looks, about her smile. I am possibly doing everything that I can, but I don't feel she believes that I think she's pretty. Or maybe it's because that she is just not happy about her body and that is being projected through her dismissal of my compliments.
Recently, we had a conversation about sex outside the bed. And she said that she does want to try this new thing, but she is very conscious about her body. So maybe after some time when she loses weight. So that was a concrete moment where I realized that yes, she does think about her body. She's conscious of it and does not like it.
So in the end, how do I make my girlfriend feel good about her body? What's the most I can do? What's the least I can do? What can I do? I just want to make her feel special and good. I want to make her feel that this is normal. I want to make her feel that it's okay that these phases come and go.
She'll always be the prettiest woman that I'll ever know. Or that I've had the privilege to know.
Thank you in advance :)
If I was feeling down, I would want someone to tell me "I wish you could see yourself how I see you. What I see is someone who is..." and so on. Perhaps reassure her that your relationship is safe and that you don't plan on going anywhere, and that you love her just the way she is.
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