Had a bad falling out with my ex best friend in March. We drove across the country together for a concert and were having a good time up until the day of the concert. I noticed I was annoying her (unintentionally with anything I said) and some weird tension but just let it go and didn’t think much of it. I was having a little diva moment and said “models and modeling are insipid” while mentioning I liked photo shoots just not the whole industry bc it’s sketchy. She got very noticeably disturbed by me saying that and began raising her voice at me, shaking her finger at me, quivering her lip, and looking pretty disgusted with me and called me hypocritical, “icky”, judgmental and mean. She went off for a few minutes at me and said at least 6 times she doesn’t want me going on a tirade or a tangent… We were at a restaurant when it was happening so employees and customers were looking at us and then when I told her she was bringing me down a lot and seemed harsh she said “you obviously need to calm down so I’m going to walk away and let you calm down” and was shaking dude.

The rest of the day and for the concert was awkward and tense. I shut down on her after all that because everything I was saying was upsetting her and making things worse so the concert wasn’t very fun and I was having a hard time bc it was my first one since covid and it was really crowded way at the top where we were in the arena and I was honestly just not having fun and keeping to myself bc she was still being passive aggressive towards me. Next day we wake up, hit the road, we’re talking a little more and just ready to get home. She takes the wheel to give me a break but is driving my car 20 over the speed limit, taking mountain turns really sharp, and almost got us in a head on collision. When I started getting tense bc I thought we were gonna wreck, she started yelling at me while driving about how I ruined the whole trip, I let one little mishap ruin everything, I had been acting pissy since she went off on me, she didn’t want me to go on a tangent, how she didn’t know what else to do bc she apologized (“I’m sorry I said anything to you, I should have just kept my mouth shut”) etc. I just shut down again man, I truly felt like nothing I could say would fix anything and I didn’t want to make things worse while she was driving my car crazy.

After I let her get it out I asked if we could pull over to stretch and maybe swap and when I took my keys back to drive she said “if you wanted to drive you could have just said that.” We get to the hotel for the night, sleep maybe 4 hours and wake up the next morning at 4am to get home early enough for her to be with her kids early before her husband worked. We wake up, are getting packed, she asked if I wanted to take a dab in the bathroom and I very nicely told her “nah I’m good man I’m just ready to hit the road”, she rolled her eyes, came back and yelled “look ellwearsprada, if you’re not going to talk to me again and we’re not friends anymore just say that!” Me “dude it’s not like that, I just wanna get home. It’s 4am can we please not do this?” Her “oh so I can’t do this but you can?!” And I just broke and told her “yes we’re not friends anymore. And I’m not doing this for 5 hours in the car. Do you want me to bring you by the airport and help you get a plane ticket or rental car because I’m not doing this for 5 hours!” She lost her shit man. She called me pathetic, childish, a shitty friend, and went to the bathroom to call her husband (they do have a history of domestic abuse to each other) and said that if I tried to drop her off or anything that they would fuck me up and “hang me”. She also said that my boyfriend was the reason I’ve been “like this”. Whatever that meant, our friendship didn’t change after I got with my current bf.

I told her to stfu and get her shit and let’s go home. I was done. She “slept”, I drove, and texted my mom that I needed back up because I was nervous dropping her off at her house by myself with him there. My mom waited down the road and waited for us to pull up and came close by the road, never got out her van or anything but just kinda kept an eye out. When she saw my mom there she lost her shit. Screamed the same insults at me, told me she hopped my “boyfriend and mommy were worth losing your best friend” trashed my car, slammed my car doors, cussed out me and my mom, and was calling me all kinds of stuff. When I got to my moms house I just broke down in tears and let her hold me and took the day to eat and sleep and smoke.

I’ve had a lot of anxiety since bc she’s been posting a lot of nasty slanderous rumors about me and calling my bf names and all kinds of shit on Twitter and Facebook. I haven’t looked at anything in over a month but I did save some things to just remind myself what she really thought of me. Now that she’s been gone I’ve had more time for my other girlfriends and hanging out with them (bc she’d give me major shit for hanging out with anyone besides her and told me she was “possessive” of me)… She does laugh react anytime any mutual friends post with me and is trying to turn other mutual friends against me. So I can’t even do that without it upsetting her still.

I’m just at a point where I want peace and to reconcile, hopefully tell her where I was hurt and apologize for shutting down on her? I can definitely see where I was being hypocritical and a diva for having a bad opinion on the modeling I was doing but I don’t feel like it warranted her snapping on me like she did or not telling me what was bothering her before it led to that. I was thinking if I reached with my heart guarded, knowing she might still be rude to me, maybe if I apologize for shutting down on her and offer to make it right (pay her back for the tickets of the concert we went to) maybe it’ll give both of us some closure and she’ll stop being so bad online. But then again my life is going so good and I have so much more time for my other girl friends, I wonder if I’m letting something bad back into my life and maybe just let time heal this wound and focus on my other friends. I have ran into her husband at the store and he stared me down and smirked and it was very awkward. I’d like to try to make things less awkward when we inevitably run into each other again. I have no pride. An apology for peace might be worth it but I am confused.