My whole life I’ve been mocked and teased for my size, even by my own birth father. My whole life I’ve believed without a sliver of a doubt that I was ugly and unlovable. Someone went so far as to make a tumblr about how fat I am. I have been through some shit and now I think I have body dysmorphia because every time I look at the scale, or the mirror, all I think about is how grotesque I am. I can lose 5lbs and think to myself “it’s not good enough, it’s never gonna be good enough.” I just want to love myself the way my husband loves me. I want to feel comfortable and confident. But the second I get out of my car somewhere, or leave my house, it only takes 1 person looking at me in a weird way for me to utterly depressed the rest of the day.

My SW was 413, I’m now at 362. I can’t seem to get out of the 60s and it’s just causing me to lose a lot of my will power/drive.

How do y’all get through the thoughts and keep pushing? What do you do to get over the hump when you plateau? What do you do to help change your perspective/mindset about your body?

TIA

edited to fix spelling