Hi there! I have a little experience with being dommed. I consider myself a switch. In my on and off search for a domme over the years I have been scarred, jaded and left hopeless. Okay, a little dramatic, yes, but I can’t take another 15 min out of my day to write another heartfelt, genuine message to a “domme” only to be met with “are you ready to be my slave”. Either I’m the most gullible person ever and can’t tell scams from genuine people, or there’s just 1 genuine dome per every 10 scams. You may feel similar for getting tons of low-effort, “hi mistress” messages from guys, so maybe disappointment is something we can bond over. 

First off, I am not necessarily looking for a 24/7 dynamic. By that I mean I do not want to be controlled at all times even when we are not talking. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy being controlled, as embarrassing as that is to admit. But I do not want to be in a sub head space all day long. Secondly, I am looking for a genuine connection! I want to genuinely get to know you as a person, and for you to get to genuinely know me. I would like a friendship at the core of it. Making each other laugh, teasing one another, talking about our day. Things like that make the connection powerful, it allows us to be vulnerable, and it’s honestly the only way I can get true enjoyment out of this. This will primarily be online. However, if you live on the West Coast US then it may very easily undergo a metamorphosis into something more. 

Ok, enough context, now for some information you probably needed at first. 

Me

I am 23, almost 24. I have medium length black curly hair. I am fit but on the thinner side. Height is 6’1. Not super hairy (but no I am not a naked mole rat). I have a lot of interest from science, history, philosophy, really anything that I can learn. I enjoy learning and I take pride in having knowledge. As for hobbies I enjoy playing my instruments, working out, reading, podcasts, the paranormal, going for runs/walks. 

Who am I looking for?

Someone who is gentle, kind, nurturing, perhaps a little shy. I do have some preferences, but none of these are requirements. However, I do still enjoy strict and mean. A healthy balance is perfect. Looks-wise I’d prefer someone on the thinner to slightly thick side. While I have no height requirements, the smaller the better. I have a thing for smaller women being in control of a much larger man like myself. I love that feeling where my size counts for nothing. Hair color is not important at all. Neither is eyes, skin or race. If you don’t fit the body type preferences, you can still of course message me! Personality is more important than anything. I will always pick the interesting, compatible person who’s still cute over the super hot, boring one. 

I’d prefer someone who shares my interest as well, but of course people are best compatible when there are still enough differences. Tell me what interests you! What your hobbies are, what you love, what you hate. I want to know you. Of course we are adults and we have our busy lives, so we should both understand that being able to talk 24/7 is not an option, but the more the better! 

Im not too picky about age. I know there are some women in their 40s looking for much younger men. I would say 40s is the limit, and I would prefer someone closer to my age by a few years, younger or older. 

As I said, the closer you are the easier this is for this to become an IRL dynamic, but that is not necessary. If you are far away we could still make it work in the future, or if you want to keep this strictly online that works too. I am very open minded. I am also not sure if I’m necessarily looking for a relationship. If it blossoms into that then I would love that. But for now I want to keep it more causal and as a friendly Dom/sub dynamic. 

Something important to me is sharing our lives. I’d like to be able to share pictures of our pets, what we’re up to, and of ourselves. It helps me feel connected to the other person. Of course this takes time and trust on both ends. 

Kinks

You have probably been speed reading my novel to finally get to this part. I hope not! But it’s still important for compatibility purposes. 

Here are a FEW of my kinks: light bondage, cbt, spanking, light degradation, choking, edging, teasing, anal play, body writing, toys, praise (both ways), clamps, and many more. I am huge on aftercare and being listened to. Let’s just say as a Dom I would treat others the way I wanted to be treated. 

Limits: Scat, blood, extreme pain, being a slave, and any sort of child related play. 

If there’s something you really like that’s not on the list, just ask! I want to establish open communication and I am very open minded. If I am not okay with something I will let you know, and I expect the same. I also have sort of an exhibition kink, so I love to show myself during play, and sometimes see the other person. That can be video calls or just pictures, whichever we feel comfortable with. But if that is a limit to you then it would not work out. 

Please do not let my experience as a Dom scare you. If you are new to this and want me to be your guinea pig I would love helping you learn this along with me. I also ask for grace since I am quite new to this as well. I want to give this side of me some more attention. 

If you have read this novel, please feel free to send me a chat and tell me some stats about you, what you want from this dynamic, and maybe what you liked about my post!