So I sucked it up and went out for my friends birthday at Karaoke, Ive come to realize im just shell shocked when I see someone I find to be attractive and I even dressed up like a guy that was ready to tear it up in a night club or some shit whatever the point is on paper I was looking good. I was wearing a Lyle n Scott dress shirt, grey jeans, puma shoes, my hair was good, I put cologne on yet nobody came up to me that was interested. I have no game, no confidence to approach and yet it’s funny how I show personality actually singing in front of people rather than a single individual in front of me, it’s fascinating how terrible I am at being a man trying to socialize. all the whisky’s in the world can’t help me, I can’t do it sober… I’m just cooked I guess.

I think my gold ray ban aviator glasses are holding me back to I seem to get tons of bad looks and I just feel like total shit

Maybe this is the reason why I’m so lonely just because I can’t talk to people men or women, I was just at the bar with my ex who’s now my best friend or one of and her new bf so safe to say I was looking for someone that might of been interested and it just never happened I will say there was a group of girls that somehow always wanted to go to the same spot as me the entire night right beside me and the one was very cute yet I said nothing to them so maybe that was a sign to say hi but I’m just a loser that fears rejection and failure so what’s the point. there was another girl that kinda was showing some signs dancing a lot near me again and even tapped me on the shoulder but I’m just a fucking pussy and I couldn’t do it

Being an introvert is the worst fucking feeling when you’re not in a comfortable position and not forced but when you want to go out into the world and yet you don’t feel you belong out in it.

Anyways I’ve drank a lot tonight and I’m prepared to feel more shit in the morning

Maybe I’m just destined to be lonely forever