27M who threw all his cards on the table in the worst scenario relationship he could in desperation do to his loneliness. I don't find it a mistake because she was a wonderful experience, but now I feel more alone then ever, I miss having a F in my life and I don't want friends, I just want to keep the feeling of being in love...

It's a very odd thing for me, I used to have many friend groups I would always jump around, and now I can't stand any of them, I just want to feel in love again it's specific and hard to get over.

I don't even want to be alive, hell, I spent an hour just now following meet-up subreddits in my area in hopes of finding anything, I don't even know what I'm doing, I don't think it's even the right move I just can't get this clawing demon/cancer out of my skin.