You wake up everyday, anxious, it’s quiet and the space next to you is never filled. The same notifications every morning.. with the same junk emails or the same promotional text messages. No one saying good morning or I’ve missed you. No one responding to your deep response from the night before because you two stayed up so late enjoying the exchanged words on the screen. No one to day dream about, daylight is silent, sunsets are quiet, and your imagination of “what if’s” are left to run rapid. What if I could have someone to day dream about? What if feelings you long to feel could be true? What if someone longed to fill that space next to you? Instead you’re a academia manic and a workaholic.. diving into your career is the only thing making the silence tolerable. However, I drown in the moments when time and space seem to pause, because it’s instantly suffocating me. I live alone. I dine alone. I work alone. I travel alone. I think of the what if’s all alone. So I wake up, everyday, anxious and it’s quiet. I dive into my work and damn well make it tolerable. This my life.