So I've been waking up every day by 3am since I broke up with my ex. I wake up to nightmares about her, and it all just reminds me of how fucking depressing this whole situation is. One week or two ago we were talking about how we'd be together forever. Three days ago, she admits not only she's "in love" with my friend (she's obsessed, they barely talked to each other and she's projecting an image of him that doesn't really exist) and has been for months, having tried to hold on to me but failing to do so.

I wouldn't really mind being a sobbing, blubbering mess by day, it's to be expected. Since I met her, I managed to cry often and it's just to be expected my doing so after she discarded me. But I can't have peace even during my sleep.