My recent LO episode, I was obsessed about stalking his Facebook for his photos, specially pictures of him with his family, pictures from his childhood.

Looking at him being a carefree child somehow answered questions for me.

Basically my LO is not a nice person. He was incredibly manipulative when we interacted, used me to fulfil his fantasies. I often find myself ashamed that I was and am attracted to someone who is recovering from smoking and drinking addiction, he is also addicted to masturbation and porn. Maybe looking at pictures of his childhood where he is innocent and carefree, helps me feel better about myself. I don't see any other way of explaining this.

Does anyone relate?