I know the obvious answer is to find another therapist but it was hard for me to tell the first one. my therapist read up on limerence because she didn’t know what it was and tried to help within her area but she mentioned that i should see a psychiatrist for evaluation and another therapist who heavily specializes in addiction. I’ve noticed as well i haven’t been making much progress with her.

in the past two weeks i just realized that my LO has friendzoned me and i’m starting to accept this reality. My friends think my limerence is really bad and compared me to the guy Joe from the Netflix series You. Limerence has made my friends believe i’m some sort of stalker…. which i don’t agree with but i did just spend 90minutes scrolling through strangers facebooks just to see and screenshot additional photos of my LO. I’m ready for NC even though i’ll see her in a month (which will send me on another downward spiral). I havent seen my LO since thursday and I plan to keep it that way until the inevitable work event in a month.

I keep telling myself I hate her. i want to forget about her. she is not my type and we’re not compatible. I wish she didn’t exist. but i’m really just suppressing the feelings that i really like her and want to spend the rest of my life with her. i think about her almost every hour of the day. I wish she could give me a chance. But it’s clear i’m friend zoned and i really need to move. the hardest part of moving on, for me, is dreaming about my LO which ruins my progress, essentially my relapse.

sorry for grammar i’m just venting