I'm not sure if they teach this in life coaching schools but one thing I recommend for people who are looking to get into the life coaching arena and becoming a life coach is to really look to see what sort of life they want FIRST and then build their business and life around that SECOND.

Most get into it the other way around- how it will fit financially with their material lifestyle / FIRST. . .and building a life coaching practice around that SECOND.

There's nothing wrong with doing it that way - but how you get into it, and your mindset will shape how your business looks (what sort of business model you have), who you will work with, what sorts of relationships you will have with your clients and how your life will look at well.

Often when people put together a business, it's coming from the filter of "how much money can / will I make" or "can I survive financially". So many often look at it like "how can I make 6 figures" or "how can I make tons of money" - so I can do the material things I enjoy . . .where maintaining material lifestyle is the number one consideration (and also from a place of "great attachment" to this lifestyle).

Certainly there is nothing wrong with this. . .However - extremely rarely do I ever hear "how can I make ENOUGH and build my business around that concept with a business model of working with people in a way that really fills my soul.

It seems like accredited life coaching schools, accredited programs and mentors play into this this idea. How do I know??? . . .Well - you just have to look at all the ads out there for programs, life coaching schools, go on to the life coaching Facebook forums and see what the most predominant sales pitches are how things are being marketed . . .Frequently - the promise of how you too can be making 6 figures doing this - and perhaps they wouldn't be able to fill their programs to the same extent otherwise if they weren't selling things in this way.

Coming from that place - the coaching model often involves how to get lots and lots of clients (reaching out to as many people as possible), building big lists and folllowings, or how to have fewer high paying clients - more high rollers- but always with the end goal of having lots of money coming in. . .rarely, if ever, the goal of having "enough" money come in. . .more like how to have lots.

Are these accepted models however really how they turn out to be in the end? Has anyone really examined the lives of people selling these dreams to see if they're actually what they say they are to be? Even if you finally manage to reach the point where you have lots of clients, lots of moving parts in your business, constantly having to keep on top of marketing to constantly have to be bringing in new clients, or have worked it out to be working with a smaller group of really high rollers - are those models of business actually how they turn out to be in the end with the quality of life you want with a greater sense of peace, love and joy in life? . . .it's a question that rarely if ever gets asked. . .and I realize these sorts of things might be very challenging to look at. It's more like "well . . .everyone else is doing it that way - so it must be the right thing!"

I say this more for the benefit of the people looking to get into coaching or for the new coach starting looking at what other coaches are doing with their websites, marketing campaigns, Instagram profiles, Facebook profiles and thinking that these coaches who look like they have it altogether, have it made and are living the life. . .and then end up comparing themselves and beat themselves up thinking that they are not there or thinking it's impossible to have something like that for themselves.

But do we really have the complete picture? Is this really the case that the people you might be comparing yourself to are really living the life and dream? I know a lot of coaches with really beautiful websites, posh marketing campaigns who are barely able to survive or, on the other end of the spectrum, some who are so busy, with so many clients, having to manage so much with all the moving parts to the business that they don't really have much peace in their life . . .but it "appears" good / "looks good from the outside" so it must be good . . .and this is not to say that there aren't people out there who have incredible business models, their lives totally rich, lots of peace, love, and unbelievably good. . . I'm just looking at something else.

Just some food for thought here. . .and a good enquiry that might have people start to look at things from a different perspective when designing a business and a life as well as a reminder to never ever compare yourself with anyone else. . .their journey might not be right for you at all.

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Someone not too long ago asked me about how to set up contracts with clients and I've also had that question come up a number of times in the past with other people I've worked with as they were getting into coaching. I know it's something that comes up and gets covered in life coaching schools as well. . .

Anyhow - I had to reflect on that and say that I don't do contracts with clients. . .I charge on a month to month basis with them (and while I have had people pay me up front for several months of coaching as well - I just don't do contracts). . . might I do contracts in the future. . .possibly . . .but it doesn't quite feel right right now. . .

I'm not suggesting what I do is the right way to do things or anyone should do this with their business model. It may be the right thing for someone else to do to have contracts with the clients they have.

However - I made that decision to charge this way based upon what sort of life I want for myself, what sorts of clients and client relationships I want to have as a FIRST priority.

My goal was to have long-term relationships with my clients where I could work with them across many areas of their lives . . .where we could have very "real" conversations and where there was a safe, non-judgmental and unconditionally loving space where anything could get said (knowing that where the deepest level of growth occurs is not in me delivering some sort of curriculum or espousing wisdom - but rather in them getting something communicated . . .some sort of "unexamined" negative dialogue that has been bouncing around their head forever, really listening to them so they can get heard and we can see very clearly what's been driving them crazy and see if it holds water / is accurate or not. . .as well as having the "energetic emotional charge" around that thing dissipate or bleed off. In the wake of that, they reach a new level of clarity and whole new possibilities and courses of action open up for them in their life.

In the past and especially when I was starting out, I was really attached to the money, constantly worried about clients going away, and that my survival was at stake. I found that the people I worked with could pick up on this fear and it overshadowed our whole relationship as well as level of depth that could be reached in the relationship.

What I'm talking about here has more to do about trusting that if I do a really good job, people will continue to keep on wanting to stick around.

The other rationale behind charging this way, I find, is that it keeps me on my toes and constantly have to grow myself and look for new ways to provide value to my clients and keeping them engaged looking at their own lives and going deeper themselves and wanting to continue. . .of course - I have to be doing the same sort of work in my own life and be an example of this in the world . . .it's not about me getting comfortable and falling asleep once I've built some sort of curriculum or specific process for them to go through. . .but I'm not saying that might not be the perfect things for another coach to do.

I also find that clients have to confront themselves whether or not to continue each month and they're continually having to "pull the coaching towards them". They come to the calls with a different sort of hunger to grow - versus saying "do it to me" . . .where the expectation is that you keep on feeding them more and more content from a curriculum (kind of like how you would teach a course or program). If you look really closely - it's not like they're assimilating much of the content with a much deeper experiential awareness (which takes more time). . . teaching a curriculum in this way rather is more just some factoid for their minds. . .and once we had cycled through some educational curriculum, they would go away (often without seeing much change in life).

Now, it's not to say I don't have some people like that. . .I have a health coaching arm of my practice and have clients who are just looking for that and that's all they want and nothing wrong with that - and perhaps most want that) . . .I deliver the content to them and they leave after that - and that's all good too. . .people want what they want and assimilate what they can. The other thing I'm referring to is more with the "pure life coaching clients" where something else is going on . . .a gradual process of opening up and revealing more and more.

My mentor charges in this way as well - on a month to month basis. In the beginning, I wrestled with paying each month for a long time arguing about it . . .even though I was having great stuff happen in my life - until I finally just surrendered to paying for regular coaching and have that be something I incorporate into my life ongoing.

What I discovered was that by working through this piece of surrendering myself, I could help others work it out for themselves as well. The main thing to learn from all of it was that if you reach for more goodness and awareness in your life, the Universe ALWAYS provides the financial means and support to continue with what you need for this. Of course, someone has to discover this for themselves (and a really valuable lesson to learn this lifetime).

Anyhow - he used to joke with me saying that if I had a hard time paying for coaching, I'd get clients like that who had a hard time paying for coaching with me, and although I hated him for saying that - he was 100% accurate. In the beginning I got clients who had a hard time paying for my services because I had a hard time paying myself. Once I worked it out in my own life, that all changed and either got different clients or my existing clients just worked it out. My clients so often are a reflection of my own life I've come to see. . .

Charging in this way on a month to month basis is probably a more challenging way of doing things and realistically takes years to get really good at - being unattached to the monetary aspect. It does however foster a different level of relatedness for sure . . .and I also like my life a lot better having this greater depth in my coaching relationships with my clients. Sometimes people will go away, but I have had many come back and start again later on as well because it's providing a level of unconditional loving and listening that they can't really find elsewhere.

It's a journey to get good at these sorts of things I find . . .but really worthwhile for those who want to take it on.