I might not belong in this chat but I just wanted to get this off my chest 🥲. Delete if necessary.

But I been dealing with some anxiety for as long as I could remember but whenever I get into a relationship with anyone it seems to heighten my anxiety. I’m currently in a relationship with this incredible person (or that’s what he portrays to me at least). He cooks for me, cleans, really does everything that a boyfriend should do. But I’m always getting these voices in my head telling me he’s cheating, he’s not actually into me, he’s waiting for someone better, just playing with my emotions, he’s things from me and plenty more scenarios that play over in my head. All these things might not be true but it’s hard to get past the voices in my head but it’s hard for me to just tell myself that it’s me overthinking everything and just worrying over nothing. He’s always reinsuring me that he wants to be with me and he wouldn’t be with me if he didn’t want to be here . But I been with horrible guys in the past that did horrible things to me and want to blame them for why I’m like this, but it gets to a point to where I have to look at myself and say it’s me and my mental health.

Here an example of the most recent thing: I was getting out the shower and came out of the room and I noticed he was sad and I proceeded to ask him what’s wrong and he’s tells me he’s having some family drama but he’s okay, so I proceeded to give him a hug but I’m the back of my head I’m thinking maybe someone he was talking to broke up with him and he’s sad, he’s not happy being with me, or he wants to end things but scared to because he will hurt my feelings.

He barely tells me anything about he so I assume he’s hiding things from me. I’m always the one telling him things about me. It’s like he’s closed off. But he says he’s wants to be with me and have kids.

Also he has this thing where he said he would never post me on his social media because he’s a private person, so my friends and family are the only people that knows about us and I just feel like someone he’s hiding me, so i feel like he doesn’t like me. He tells me that my friends and family should be enough and I shouldn’t worry about anyone else knowing. It could be because he’s not out yet but I would love to be for people to know about me on his social media.

But to sum everything up I looking for advice on how to stop the voices and just be happy with the guy I’m with.

We only been together for a little over a month, yes I know that’s very short but I’m known to catch feelings very fast.

Thanks for listening to my horrible life 😅