I'm tapering off of benzos after 10 years of usage. I was prescribed 1mg of Lorazepam twice per day which I took as prescribed for 10 years with the exception of those extreme anxiety situations where I could feel a potential panic attack on the horizon (I may have taken 3 or 4, but this only happened every once in awhile).

My psychiatrist put me on 10mg Escitalopram (Lexapro) once per day, on 4/27/2022, and 5/27/2022 marked the first full month that I've been on it.

This is the hardest medication for me to understand. For years I was looking for the quick fix, instant gratification, and I was getting that with benzos, but after seeing a psychiatrist for the first time this year (I should have seen one a long ass time ago but I pushed it off forever...mental health is extremely important y'all, don't ever put it on the back burner), I came to the realization that benzos are not viable long-term and only temporarily puts a bandaid on the anxiety, where as antidepressants may be better for overall anxiety, or GAD, in the long term.

I can't even really tell whether my anxiety has gone down or not. Some days are great while other days I'm in my head being the textbook overthinker I've always been. It's just so hit or miss. I haven't seen my mom in a little while and I decided to go shopping with her at Costco today since we both needed some groceries. I've always felt uncomfortable in large crowds, but Costco is hell. All the people pushing carts around you all moody, people honking at each other over spaces in the parking lot, basically the kind of s**t that kicks my anxiety into overdrive because I overthink bad scenarios in my head, like I'm going to get into an argument with someone in Costco over something trivial.

I'm not so naive as to think that anxiety just goes away 100% on lexapro, but I've read so many anecdotal reports about people being calm, cool, and collected on lexapro. Lexapro has seriously changed many people's lives for the better...they are a better version of themselves...they make themselves available to others, they workout at the gym, they function at a high level at work, etcetera etcetera (basically things they didn't do before lexapro because anxiety held them back). I don't feel like this yet. I'm still holed up in my apartment, window shades closed, not even doing basic s**t like taking the trash out or washing dishes SMDH

My understanding is that it takes 4 - 8 weeks to stabilize in the system, but this can vary from person to person (for some people it takes 6 months). I hate to make rash generalizations, but with the exception of those few people who don't feel it even after 6 months, or at all for that matter, MOST people generally say that the first month is just crap, but after the first month things improve significantly.

MY QUESTION: Is there anyone else that has been taking lexapro that didn't feel much beneficial effects during the first month, but did notice a significant change during the second month? Can someone just tell me that it gets better during the second month, and that I'm overthinking this?