You left us almost 5 years ago and i realize now that you are no longer in pain. But the pain for the rest of us doesn't stop. You left a whole in us that will never be filled. I miss you so so much that it's hard to put into words. I needed you so many times on the past five years. I needed your advice when my marriage was crumbling. But I dusted myself off and kept pushing forward. I graduated for college and I told no one. Not mom, not my brother or my sisters. Ever since you passed the glue that was there holding us together is gone. It's hard to explain but I don't have the desire to be around anyone from our family. And to be honest I don't think they want to be around me either. I'm OK with that, I'm moving soon I was offered a job in Texas that is my dream job. When I move I'm going to have to say good by to a special person. She is amazing she has two kids that I think you would really like if you meant them. But when the time comes it won't be easy but I know it's for the best. I know that you are in heaven I know that everything I get on my bike and ride down that highway you are there. I know when I fixing something and it clicks in my head you are there. I know that one day we will see each other again. But until then you and grandpa and Mark keep build that dream house and driving us crazy down here. Love you Dad

Ps Thank you for reading this it helps.