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32F here and struggling a bit in this poly world. I’m married to a man, we have kids together. I’m honest when meeting women about the way my relationship works. We’re financially I depended of each other which brings about freedom in the way we date. (He is also bi). I have this longing for connection and intimacy with a woman (I’ve had it before and it was amazing) but she ended things because she decided to be monogamous. This broke my heart, but here I am open to it again. I’m feeling discouraged because I haven’t had much luck meeting women who are ok with my marriage. It often ends with “if you were single, there would be no question”. Would love to hear words of wisdom from those who have navigated this successfully 😔
Well, what are you looking for?
Someone for date nights out every week or so? A long term partner who you live near and is involved enough in your life to meet your kids? Someone with the potential to eventually become another nesting partner, who will have to be cool with living with your spouse and kids (and vice versa)?
Start there and communicate upfront that “I’m not looking for another spouse relationship but I want more than hookups” or whatever it is you land on.
And for the love of women, look for other polys.
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- 5 months ago
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