Background:

• Step-Father’s Passing: My step-father died last month. My mom inherited all his assets, and most of his accounts had Transfer on Death (TOD) designations. In exception was the family business, which is the big thing going to probate for him.
• Mom’s Health: Mom is currently in hospice and has been declared mentally fit ten times. Despite her doctors' orders and her late husband’s wishes, she kept returning home. She has a history of severe health issues (cancer, heart failure, clots) that landed her in the ICU multiple times since July, but she was consistently deemed mentally competent each time. This ongoing situation contributed to my step-father’s suicide.

Guardianship Attempt:

• We tried to file for emergency guardianship but withdrew after a week, due to mom selecting a friend of hers as medical directive and going no contact with us (we feared this person we didn't know was bad news). Mom reached out and decided to stay in a nursing home to break the cycle. She seemed better and more like herself during this time. Her friend ended up being a good ally.

Will Modification:

• Mom’s Request: Mom wanted to change her will to exclude her stepfather’s children. She instructed me to handle it last week.
• Action Taken: I drafted a modified will based on her previous one, which her estate attorney had prepared months ago. The new will was:
  • Signed with non-beneficiary witnesses.
  • Notarized in a recorded notarize.com session
  • Recorded on video, where I asked her about her intentions and ensured she was sure about the changes (iPhone in room) for the entire signing session (one was an hour, the other 45 mins)
  • Done twice to correct initial mistakes (first as a beneficiary witnessed the will incorrectly, then redoing it properly), both recorded sessions.
• Additional Changes: Mom also modified the business partnership agreement, transferring the family business to the beneficiaries ahead of time.

Legal and Family Challenges:

• Lawyer Availability: With the holidays approaching, we couldn’t secure a lawyer to visit the hospice. Mom had hired one, but the attorney opted out, they may have notes of mom's wishes during a period she was not in contact with her children.
• Stepfather’s Children: They’ve been sending hostile messages, claiming Mom is incompetent and demanding copies of the wills. I advised them to contact our lawyer and stopped communicating with them.
• Mom’s Defense: Mom recorded a video stating the current date, her location, and her intention to modify her will, reinforcing her wishes despite being weak and bed-bound today.

Personal Feelings:

• I want what’s best for Mom and prioritize her well-being over any disputes. I’m frustrated by the stepfather’s children’s inappropriate behavior, especially since they haven’t been involved or present for years. Mom wasn’t fond of his kids, and dad's daughter had previously pressured him about his will when visiting her grandchild for the first time.

Probate of Step-Father’s Estate:

• Current Status: It’s been about two months, and we haven’t started probate. Mom is the executor, and I’m her Power of Attorney (POA). Our lawyer is getting this started after the holidays.
• Challenges:
  • The stepfather’s children are hostile and may complicate the probate process, are named backup executors for his estate.
  • The family business lacks provisions for death or transfer, making it subject to probate since Mom and Dad were 50% partners.
  • I’ve consulted our lawyer for specifics on handling asset transfers and the business’s probate process.

Concerns:

• Legal Protection: Did we do enough to protect the will and minimize the risk of contestation?
• Mom’s Peace: I don’t want Mom’s final days to be overshadowed by stress or having to be constantly recorded to safeguard her wishes.

I'm already working with an attorney, but I'm posting here for some small reassurance to calm further stress as I'm near breaking point with loosing my parents already.