Hi Reddit,

I (f, 30) dated an event creator (m, 30) and hurt him emotionally. He told me to stay away from his events. I have always, and will, continue to exclude myself from events in which he is the sole creator.

However, there are other creators too, some private and some non-profit, who throw the same type of events. We are all part of a hobby community. Sometimes, these creators collaborate to throw a joint event.

After the breakup, I reached out to him twice. Once was for closure (4.5 months ago) he said no, and I left it at that. I have seen him at other people’s events but have not approached him at all. The second time (yesterday), I let him know I have been respectful of his wish to stay away from his solo events, but was going to be at a co-produced event of his and another non-profit. This event is at a public restaurant and I was invited by the non-profit organizers and I another friend who is also in the community. I had/have zero plans to ever speak with him, I would be attending to hang with my friends and do the hobby.

However, he told me if I showed up, I would be removed and he would get a restraining order. He said I am not welcome at his place of work and the text was a “formal warning”.

I have never threatened or harassed him in my entire span of knowing him. I believe it is reasonable to attend a co-produced event in a public restaurant by another non-profit, community organization, when the purpose is for the hobby.

I am slightly fearful though, that if I attend, he will have a basis for a restraining order.

The easy answer is to stay away completely. However, my hobby is a big part of my life and I believe it is appropriate to attend a public event so long as I stick to myself and I was invited by one of the organizers. I do not want my life/hobbies dictated by a man whose feelings I hurt especially when I have not actually harassed or threatened him.

Is anyone able to help me out with understanding if he has a legal basis? I would appreciate any advice.