I started smoking when I was 13. I got in trouble with my parents, but i kept smoking. I got in trouble at school, but i kept smoking. I got arrested for cannabis at 18, but i kept smoking. I stopped when i was on probation, but as soon as it was over, i kept smoking. I moved to a county where weed was very hard to get, but i kept smoking. I moved to a country where it was easy to get, so i kept smoking. I failed school, but i kept smoking. I didn’t want to go to class high anymore, but i kept smoking. I wanted a girlfriend more than anything, and weed made me shy and awkward, but I kept smoking. I stated a business, and I kept smoking. I lost the business, and I kept smoking. I got evicted by my landlord, taking blame for his daughter smoking, but I kept smoking. I was homeless, but I kept smoking. I was living in complete poverty, but I kept smoking. I had to go on welfare, but I kept smoking. I was in a horrible relationship, weed was the only thing we had in common, but I kept smoking. I finally got a “real job, and I kept smoking. I lost that job, and I kept smoking. I decided to sell drugs, and I kept smoking. My house got raided, and I kept smoking. I was homeless again, and I kept smoking. Got into another bad relationship, and I kept smoking. Somehow beat the case, found a place, and left an abusive relationship, but I kept smoking. Another “real” job fell in my lap, and I kept smoking. Then Covid came, so I kept smoking. I got laid off, but I kept smoking. I started another business, and I kept smoking. I burned myself out completely to ashes, yet I kept smoking. I got into a car accident, had a mental breakdown, but I kept smoking. I slowly put the pieces of my brain and willpower back together, why am I still smoking? Wow, I Got another “real” job, and got a side business, guess what? I kept smoking. Recently, I got diagnosed with dangerously high cholesterol at 39, and I kept smoking.

There have been breaks in between but I always went back.

It has been 24 hours since I last smoked. I am NEVER GOING BACK.

Thank you if you read the whole thing. I plan to look at this when I get weak. I’d say wish me luck but luck has nothing to do with this. I’m lucky to be alive, lucky to not be dead or in prison.

I’m no longer content with wasting this precious gift I’ve been given. It ends tonight.

Edit: Thank you so much everyone for your amazing kind words, you all have no idea how much it means to me. I came home last night after 2 beers and convinced myself hitting some resin from my bowl would be ok, then I read this back and feel asleep peacefully.

Thank all you kind strangers for believing in me.