So my girlfriend and I have been dating for a little less than a year. We are semi long distance so we don’t get to the opportunity to have sex very often but when we do it’s really good. The thing is that I know it could be better. I always feel a tinge of nervousness during sex because this is my first wlw relationship and well it’s not hers. It’s hard for me to not get in my head about what I’m doing or if I could be doing something else. We’ve talked about it before and we are pretty much on the same page (both have some anxiety about our performances). I think what I’m trying to ask is how can I get out of my head while we’re having sex? How do I engage in “dirty talk” without feeling cringy or silly? How do I get her to be more comfortable communicating her needs and wants?

I feel like I have more to say but don’t have the right words to express it. I’m more than comfortable elaborating if needed. Thanks in advance