Hi All,

I posted in /r/UKPersonalFinance and was advised to post here instead. I have received a job offer for £24,000 ($32,700 for those in the US) and which is lower than what I was looking for (my minimum been £25,000, $33,700). I am currently in a position so I can walk away if needed but wouldn't like to.

The job offer came via the email below:

Hi Skudgee,

Following on from my earlier call I am pleased to confirm that you have been successful in your application for the role of [Job] and I look forward to you joining us.

We will send over official confirmation to you shortly but for the time being just wanted to confirm the key points:

• [Job] based at the [office location].
• Working hours will be 8am – 4.30pm based on 37.5hrs working week with 1hr lunch.
• Salary £24k.
• Holidays 24 days plus Bank Holiday.

To set the ball rolling at my end please could you send through proof of your Right to Work in the UK, so a copy of your photocard driving license will do.

After going through the advice I received from /r/UKPersonalFinance I have wrote up the following negotiation email and wanted to know if you think there is any way I could improve it or change/remove things that may not be necessary?

Hi [Manager]

I hope you're well.

I've been considering your offer over the past day and everything sounds good, although I would like to discuss the base salary component.

I believe I'm a particularly good match for this position, where I would add significant value to [Company]. I have a strong FM and customer services background and have built my skills up over the past 7 years. I am exceptionally good at problem-solving and have used this in my past positions to put my employers in a better position financially. I've been working with [Current employer] for over two and a half years and have experience with multiple contracts from different sectors that have taught me many important lessons. Additionally, I have extensive experience in data manipulation with Excel and other methods and have used this effectively to improve processes and create new ones that have quickly and efficiently improved contract metrics.

All of these qualities contribute directly to the core components of this particular position, and that's why I'm excited for the opportunity to work with you and your team in this capacity at [Company].

You have offered £24,000 and I would be more comfortable if we could settle between £27,000 - £28,000. I feel that amount reflects the importance and expectations of the position for [Company], and my skill set and experience as they relate to this particular position.

Thanks for your time, and I look forward to talking with you soon.

Kind regards,

Skudgee