This is hard for me to think about, let alone say, but...I almost killed myself, really, I was a hair strand away from death, let me tell you how it happened, the lowest day of my life:

At one point in my life, a few years ago, I was sick and depressed beyond belief, every day felt torturous, and I was losing hope by the second, feeling like there is nothing I can do in life, I had no job, no friends, not control, nothing, but I kept holding on to the hope that things can change.

One day, I got out of my bed, made some tea, and then got on the roof of my house to sit in the sun and get some vitamin D (it had something to do with my sickness), and I was sitting on my phone, sipping my tea and chatting with some people, and all of the sudden, I broke down in tears, cried my eyes out, I couldn't believe how low of a point I've reached in my life, I thought my worst days were behind me, but there I was, sitting out in the sun with no purpose, no reason to live, just a cup of tea and a phone, I was ready to jump, it was like a 10-15 meter fall down, it would have definitely killed me, and as I was about to do it, something within me pulled me back, it's as if it told me "No, [blank], not today, this can be the worst decision you ever make, it's not worth it, you CAN find a way out of this", and slowly but surely, I pulled myself back, then just got down and walked back in my house.

Don't get it wrong, I still suffered after that, it took me over a year to truly recover from my sickness, and I still struggle to this day, but my God, allhamdulillāh for saving me that day, I can't believe I ever wanted to end it all, I'm so, so much better today, I have a job, I have friends, I fulfill my responsibilities, and I enjoy the little things so much more, and you wanna know the best part? I reverted to Islam! Now I'm a servant of Allāh (SWT), and I would never trade that for anyone or anything ♥️

Believe me when I tell you this; good days are coming, dreams will be fulfilled, and lives will be saved, be patient, Allāh (SWT) is watching you endure your test, so raise your rank in Jannah while you are still enduring, and pray for things to be better, and wallāhi, they will get better 🤲🏼

If this post helps even on person reading it, then it's worth it.

P.S: may Allāh (SWT) answer the du'ās you made for you, just as you made them for me, ameen.