I’m black/Guyanese and Puerto Rican. My family, mainly my mother and her brothers down to the rest the newer members have a stigmatized racism against Mexicans. Something about Puerto Ricans and Mexicans having this gang/prejudice in NY from the 80s-90s.

I love who I love but unfortunately my family doesn’t agree with this. My ex was Mexican and at the time I felt I did love him. But when we broke up my sister had dm’ed him some horrible words and slurs. And when I started to date him my family had a tougher time accepting it. Now I’m thinking of moving into another relationship with someone I’m truly interested in attracted too. Someone who has substance and truly understands me. Even was even their to talk me out of wanting to die even though my family didn’t really know what to do or say.

He’s Mexican and Cuban/El Salvadoran. He’s super kind and genuine but I’m nervous to tell anyone I’m seeing him for a movie in 2-3 weeks. I still live with my mom and she frequently calls Mexicans “sketchy” or the “w” word.

It’s harder for me to engage in a relationship with anyone outside my race. It’s not because I hate myself, my race, or am fetishizing anything. It genuinely because the black men I have been around ruined my taste for me. From being abusive to freeloaders, and even the father figured I lived with was sexually/physically and emotionally abusive towards me and every female around him. I just can’t connect with one. And I’m not completely disregarding them, they’ll will have to achieve my highest standards for me to consider them.

It’s seems like everyone thinks I need someone outside my race. Or “why do I like Mexicans. “Why can’t I get with a black guy.” I just like who I like and I can’t help that.

TLDR:

How do I tell someone I’m interested in about my slightly racist family?