I had things under control for MONTHS and had a relatively normal sleep cycle, where I could usually fall asleep by 1-2, which I can live with. But since DST, I have not gotten more than 4-5 hours per night and it’s ruining my life. I’m extremely sensitive to light so I can’t sleep late. As soon as the sun comes up, I wake up and can’t go back to sleep. So I wake up around 7, regardless of how late I fell asleep. And I can’t take naps to save my fucking life, for the same reason.

I took some research chemical benzos tonight out of desperation to try and reset my internal clock, hoping that one night would be enough to help me get back to normal on my own. And my loud roommate invited some loud woman over and they’re literally up making ungodly amounts of noise, which is keeping me awake, so the pills were a waste. I can’t try again tomorrow because they’re extremely addictive and now I need a few nights before I can try again. I’m so pissed off I want to scream at them, but I don’t want them to be think I’m some psycho.

So now I’m going to be up past 3 and getting another 5 hours if I’m lucky, and feel even more like shit tomorrow than I’ve felt this entire fucking week. I wish I could die just so I could have some fucking rest.

I’m so sick of having a loud, inconsiderate roommate.i hate my sensory processing issues with light and noise. And I hate how sensitive my internal clock is that just one hour can fuck me up this badly and undo months of progress. I just hate everything about bein pg alive right now.