Me and my husband have a lot of issues and now we have just another issue working against us, my parents. My husband and me have about a 10 year age gap and we met at work while working for a big company. We fell in love and got married about a year after dating. That’s when I noticed my husband started having some issues especially with work and being able to function around the people we worked with, he would get upset at everyone for being either “snakes in the grass” or incompetent. We were about 6 months into being married and he decided he just couldn’t take working at this company anymore, I told him that that was understandable but I wanted to stay there at least for a little while. One night when his mom was visiting from out of town while we were out at dinner, his mom mentioned to me that maybe her son, my husband should work for my parents company. My parents have had a very successful construction company and my husband really admired my dad ( he doesn’t have a good father so he never had that relationship). I was kind of put on the spot since this was the first time of it being mentioned and I didn’t know what to say other than yeah maybe that is a good idea. My dad is a pretty old fashioned guy and likes to run a tight ship when it comes to his company, because of his stern approach to business typically working for family had never worked out. I told my husband that I had some hesitations about us working there ( he convinced me that I should quit and come aboard with him too) I was worried that there might me family drama and I wanted to preserve the relationship between him and my parents. He kept convincing me that there was nothing more important that working for family and helping my parents and hopefully eventually being able to take over the business for them.

Well….5 years later and it’s all blown up in my face. After switching over from the original company that we met at to working for my parents there has been so much drama. My husband who I think has undiagnosed ADHD lost all interest in my parents company, he hated the work that they asked him to do and they would have to create new positions for him so that way he’d be content for a little while, my parents would help us out with anything we needed if we were financially pinched or if we needed some help around our older house, they gave my husband 2 months paid paternity leave and then 2 years abbreviated schedule working so he could help with our newborn, and my husband never showed the initiative or desire to help them in return. They’d ask for help lifting boxes here and there and during business hours (mind you he’s getting paid) and he would kind of act annoyed or inconvenienced. This all got really bad when my dad asked him to come in full time ( with an increase in pay) and my husband spiraled. He came home ever day that week he had to work longer with a several beers saying how stressed out he was because he had to deal with traffic now. His lack of desire to work there was apparent. One day when my mom was very stressed and needed help she felt guilty for asking for help from him and she finally snapped when he gave her looks about lifting or moving some boxes. She screamed at him and he ran out of the office and hasn’t returned for a month. My dad has tried asking him to talk and he just ignored him, my mom apologized but tried to explain where she was coming from and he felt that the apology wasn’t legitimate. We have a 2 year old who absolutely adores his grandparents ( he goes into work everyday with me and my mom helps with watching him while I get some work done) and my parents are the only ones we trust watching him. My husband is ignoring my dad who has sent him several texts asking him for help with some projects my husband was working on at his business. My mom is trying to keep the peace and asked him to come over for the Super Bowl ( he got agitated because my husband doesn’t like to watch sports). Am I in the wrong for not standing by my husbands side in all of this? He wants to make a living off a YouTube channel he’s creating ( which I think he’d be great at but I don’t think that pays the bills at least not right away). He has made it a point that I stand up for my parents regardless of anything but I genuinely think my husband is in the wrong here. Any advice or opinions on the matter? I’m just very very confused.