If you haven't already seen my incessant bro-con pining in this subreddit, here's context: I'm very in love with my brother, I confessed to him a few months ago, and we're on good terms about it now, but my love is unrequited and likely to remain so. I have some hope that things could turn around someday, but not anytime soon for sure.

As I went into my therapy session last week, I knew it was time to bring this topic up. It's simultaneously my most personal secret and one of the most salient factors affecting my mental health, which had put me in a weird position where I needed to talk about my depression while awkwardly skirting around the thing that actually triggered it, so this was absolutely something I needed to approach sooner or later. Last week was when I finally decided I had enough trust in my therapist to go ahead and talk about it. Though I was honestly terrified. Up until this Spring, I'd gone several years without mentioning these feelings to anyone, let alone a therapist. I knew I was relatively safe as far as confidentiality goes, but I was still afraid of negative judgement I guess.

Fortunately, there was no judgement. As I explained my situation, it was immediately clear to her how real these feelings are to me, and she was so validating. As I rambled on about the butterflies I get when I'm near my brother, my daydreams, my fantasies, my yearning, and all the qualities of his I admire, she had this huge adoring smile, which turned to a look of genuine disappointment when I mentioned that my brother doesn't want to be with me. Instead of telling me there was something wrong with me, she told me it was sweet, I was brave for coming out to him, and if we ever did get together, she'd be happy for me.

Y'all, that almost made me cry. I cannot communicate how much of a relief it was to hear her say that, after spending years afraid to express this part of me because I thought the whole world would hate me.

She knows about my family trauma and sees how it could be connected, but doesn't see anything unhealthy about that. Sometimes trauma causes people to develop differently, and those differences aren't always bad.

Her specialization happens to be in relationships & marriage counseling (which was something I sought out for other reasons) so she's in a good position to determine what is and isn't a healthy expression of romance. To see her being so nonchalant and accepting about incest was a huge boost to my confidence and lends a lot of credibility to this community I think.

So anyway, I wanted to share this experience for the sake of anyone who's in a position like mine. It's definitely worth talking to a therapist about it if you feel safe doing so. Your experience may or may not be as positive as mine, but they will probably be more understanding than you think.