How did you start doing stuff for yourself, that brought you happiness?

My entire life I've been pulling at peoples sleeves, trying to get them to see me or let me in or acknowledge me, and it's never worked. Every relationship I've been in I've been the "mom" or whatever, and had a tendency to attract uninspired, lazy men. When I read about the problems and conditioning parts of my chart I nearly started crying. I've received some amazing advice from reading about this whole Human Design thing and I have a tiny question for you, my fellow Projectors

How can I stop living so much for other people, and start living for me? I feel like I'm almost addicted to having someone around almost all the time. Not necessarily physically, but I talk on the phone to people every day or hang out. And I initiate most of the time. It's super odd, cuz lately I've been feeling hella lonely, and I just feel like if I stopped contacting my friends first, I'd have none.

So basically, what stuff do you like to do for YOU? How do I uncondition myself from this codependency? What are some stuff you enjoy to do for yourself? What's good selfcare for projectors?

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Sorry about the rant lmao