So last night I sat down with my husband and signed up for 3 online matchmaking websites. Two are lifestyle specific and one is more a generic dating site. Waking up and reading all the message I have received has been an experience.

I was very specific in my profiles about what I'm looking for. That includes:

• local to me (within 1 hour drive)
• have a place to play with no family or roommates
• single - NOT married and cheating, and NOT married with permission
• within my preferred age range
• moderately attractive - although I'm not all that demanding in this regard
• willing to get tested
• willing to use protection ALWAYS when with someone else
• willing to meet 1-2x per month, sometimes for an evening and sometimes for an overnight
• willing to entertain occasional quickie stop-offs
• willing to be with me, on some occasions, immediately after I've been with husband and/or 1st boyfriend

I know, I'm demanding. But this is what works for us.

I have some advice for you guys who are on dating sites. DO NOT send dick pics, especially when it says so right in my profile. Nothing screams I DONT CARE ENOUGH ABOUT YOU TO READ YOUR PROFILE AND RESPECT YOUR WISHES more than doing this. Also, be original. Find something in the ladies' profile and comment directly on it. This shows you take an actual interest in the person. I get that that takes effort. Dating takes effort. Relationships take effort. Life takes effort.

Of the close to 100 total responses I received across the three platforms, about half were instant-delete-and-block due to clearly not reading my profile (many with unsolicited dick picks). Most of the remaining were from guys outside of my geographic area, and the remaining few were way outside my age range, lived with roommates, or married and "about to be separated soon, once I tell my wife". Sigh. Perhaps I'll never find a 2nd boyfriend.