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I grapple with this problem often and has been on top of my mind for the last few years. Transitioning medically is something I see as a big leap in lifestyle and a huge commitment. I have somewhat transitioned socially with some friends and my family knowing my desire to be a woman and occasionally present as a woman around them. I've also gone through therapy.
When I'm at work, out and about or with friends presenting as male, I don't feel like I must be seen as a woman. It would feel weird to be called girl when I look like a guy because it feels a bit insulting in the moment and would probably raise eyebrows with other people around. While Id prefer to have been presenting fem in style and my body, I feel like I move through the world just fine as an AMAB.
As I sit on my bed, here I am on Reddit on a trans sub, and before this was on transtimelines seeing for people like me to get a glimpse what I could look like. I have bookmarked govt sites for a legal name change and gender marker for when I'd need them. Whenever I step out of the shower, I look at my body and see the parts of me that look like what women have and feel excitement that I'm not that far off but also recognize the masculine parts sigh.
Tl;dr I interact with the world well enough without transitioning, I'm trying to find reasons for why I should and shouldn't medically transition because it grips me when I'm alone.
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- 1 year ago
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