4/18/23 UPDATE See here, turned down: https://imgur.com/a/Lcm9Qtw

I'm still taking how I view texting into consideration but onward we move.

tl;dr : I (32M) went on what I thought was a good first date with someone (33F) last Friday and we both agreed it went well and made plans to hang out again this coming Sunday. Only thing is shes a very sparse texter, but, I'm wondering if its me and I need to reassess how much I care about texting.

Details: I just jumped back on the app after taking maybe a 6 month break and about a year since I'd dated anyone semi-seriously from it (my last couple attempts that I thought were going somewhere after a few months ended in them getting cold feet and that happened 2-3 times in a row so that exhausted me like crazy). The past Fall and Spring were also mega busy for me finishing my last year of grad school, I'll be done in a week and a half and felt the itch to try dating again so here I am.

Anyways, got back on the app maybe almost 2 weeks ago, just floating through matches and conversation, match up with someone who lives close and we had a few quick but positive exchanges and she offered to just pull the band aid and meet for a drink to gauge in person vibes, tbh that was my speed, I've done the app rodeo enough I'd rather get right to it.

So we met up and it was actually a really nice date, we had some wine at a local place near her apartment, went to this tiny little free concert venue bar down the way and had hot dogs and then she felt comfy enough to invite me back to her place to game and sing TV karaoke and the energy all felt very good and I was surprised how much we ended up having in common since I wouldn't have guessed it all from her profile. There wasn't any hooking up or sudden moves for quick intimacy either (I try to avoid that), it was just a real solid night with someone I was clear I would like to keep seeing and she said the same/agreed.

I'd texted her when I got home safe that night and she sent me a thumbs up and then responded in kind in the morning confirming that she did want to keep seeing me and then I let it be for the weekend.

But, so far shes messaged me once since Friday sans that confirmation and I have to admit that I'm not a fan of it because I like talking with someone I'm seeing/interested in but more so because I'm not used to it. I'm not going to waste my time assuming in either direction but I can say that I don't think I'm a huge fan of low texting relationships, at least thus far, I'm trying to get out of my comfort zone a little bit and get myself to back off on it because in the long run while I think I enjoy talking to a match like that because of the reassurance of interest, I do also know that texting a lot or having such constant communication early on can lead to potential burn out so...I don't know I feel like I'm at a loss. I don't want to come off as too energetic and needy or clingy early on but I realize that I have a preference that I'm not sure I'm happy I have and feel at odds with.

I don't want to assume shes going to ghost or isn't interested, I've had that happen dozens of times before but it's been a minute and I'm trying to start this with a fresh foot. So that's why I want some extra input. I usually have a 3 date rule as far as determining if things feel like they'll stick or not so if her and I make it that far I'll judge then if this is something I'm comfy with, but, otherwise, what should I do? Am I over thinking this? Do I have a problem? Is having a preference on texting normal/healthy? Any input is welcome fellow Hinge friends