We met while on vacation and he gave me a rose. He looks like an angel. I’ll call him A. My time was short there. His WhatsApp Messages have been slow. He probably met someone else. We are friends. We live in diff counties and if he were crazy about me, he would have tried to make it work like my friend have with their long distance bfs.

I joined a dating app Hinge around my area. Then this guy named H that resembled him with the same hair style messaged me. I didn’t think I would find a guy that with that style here and he seemed sweet. He looked so much like the guy, it was unbelievable. I started to get excited. Because he was texting me over and over again and called me beautiful and wanted to see me ASAP. I thought maybe God is sending me someone similar to the guy of my dreams. The night before the date with that guy I literally destroyed my closet looking for an outfit.

Next morning he cancelled 3 hours before. I felt pain around my chest. Yeah I cried at night that day. I didn’t think I would but felt rejected. I texted A telling him about my attempt at dating and he didn’t have anything nice to say about the hinge guy. Then I took a shower and bath and talked to myself and asked God, “why did you have to put him A in my my path and give me a rose when he wasn’t meant to me. He is so similar to me.” It is the WORST TYPE OF TORTURE. Maybe I should have never set eyes on him or met him. Or got a taste of his world because it’s all I want. What you don’t see, won’t hurt you, right? And his angel dust tortures me