I thought she was gonna be the woman I was gonna marry. Things were going so well. And then something just felt…off the last two weeks. I’ve felt this way before with women before. An emotional shift towards me by the woman I’m seeing before they dump me. I thought I was just being paranoid.

But no, it was true again.

She called me and said to me that she wanted to love me. That I checked all the boxes for her in a guy that she was looking for. That, in her words, she was “trying to force herself” to love me. But that she couldn’t. And she didn’t want to lead me on.

I wanted to fight to show her that we can still make it work. But this felt too similar to what’s happened to me before. In those instances, the woman I was seeing was done with me and didn’t feel anything anymore for me. So there was no going back. As much as I wanted to tell her we can work it out, in my heart, I could tell there was no point. So that was that.

Friday was the first day in over a year that I hadn’t communicated with her. It’s devastating. I feel alone, unwanted, and just lost.